03 Jul How much weight are you loosing for the wedding? Why I hate that question!
How much weight are you loosing for the wedding? A brutal look at the wedding diet culture!
To my knowledge no man has ever proposed with a pre nup that their bride to be looses weight? If they have, they didn’t even deserve an answer! I won’t make suggestions on what you could do instead but let’s just say it’s not nice! (Insert your exes revenge image here)
So, back to the question in hand. Wedding diets, love them or hate them? Personally, I HATE them! (Could be a short blog and leave it there). That’s not to say I don’t agree with dieting/eating healthy/exercise. Everything in moderation blah blah blah! BUT What I can’t abide is when after years of being together, someone finally gets asked the question they’ve secretly been waiting for and suddenly looses crazy amounts of weight. Completely changing how they’ve looked throughout most of their relationship.
Worse still are those around the bride to be who first congratulate, gush over the ring and then ask what diet you will be starting? Erm…pardon? Why have we created this crazy expectation as a society? Next we’ll been asking what fillers and implants we will be having for the honeymoon?!
Now before all the haters start, I dieted for my own wedding in 2012. I went from a size 24 to a size 20, still medically classed as obese, I didn’t care. I felt amazing for taking control of something and eating healthier. I’m a member of slimming world now (Hello Carolynn my bonkers consultant) but again this is about me looking after me. It’s a slow process and I’m certainly taking the scenic route, but ultimately I have 3 reasons:
1) I don’t want my gallbladder removing – I’m a big wimp when it comes to hospitals
2) I want to feel better in myself, I think ‘they’ call it healthier
3) I would like to be a size 16/18 not the 24-28 that I seem to have taken to in the last 6 years
I love the support and body positivity in group and it’s full of people who know how blummin hard it can be and show no judgement! Plus we’re all a bit crazy which helps…
So, what I’m suggesting is to do what’s right for you. If you are happy as Larry as you are then perfect, order the dress and carry on enjoying life exactly as you were. If you think that you would like to loose weight then do it for you and no one else. Your wedding pictures will show you as a happy loved up couple and ultimately be framed on your wall not the random woman you bump into at the hairdressers every other month that dared to ask that question when you got engaged. You get my point, those that love you, will love you for you not because of how you look!
Now, if you do decide to diet or join a gym then please note there are NO quick fixes with long term results! It might just take a bit of time, less takeaways, desserts and some serious dedication. If you can do that whilst planning a wedding then you get a gold star from me. I’m an emotional eater after all…
If you do any of the above take one piece of advice – never buy your dress too small as motivation, they can come in but letting them out is a different story! If you want a slimmer silhouette for your big day then a properly made plus size dress will do just that. You should look and feel a million dollars on you wedding day, that feeling comes from within.
Whilst I am having this rant I get infuriated by people on Instagram who assume I want to loose weight and to look at their page for inspiration – code word for selling some ridiculous tablet that would probably kill me in the long term. I’m an advocate for eating healthy whilst still enjoying life, not stop eating, take a pill, down a shake or drink a plant! Give me strength, nothing is more discouraging than someone telling you to look at ways you can loose weight. Its’s under MY control and you telling me in a roundabout way that being fat (yep I’ve used that word) is not socially acceptable is utter codswollop! There are huge plus size movements on Facebook and Instagram where body positivity is the priority. I have yet to meet one person who is 100% happy in how they look – tall, short, fat, thin, big boobs, no boobs, no shape, wide hips, no bum, big bum…you get the idea! Everyone has a hang up!
So perhaps the question after you get engaged should be ‘What can we do to make you body confident?’
Love Kate xx
PS. As for anyone who asks if you’re loosing weight for the wedding here are a list of my favourite answers. (Watch them squirm)
1. No, why do you think I should?
2. I don’t know, will you be loosing some?
3. No, I’m only marrying him for his money I can’t be bothered with all that.
4. Haven’t you heard of Curves @ Kates Bridal Room (my personal favourite)
5. Actually I was thinking I should put some on!